Up-dating Our Paperwork

Has it already been a year since we began this journey to adopt? Well, it has been according to our social worker. Because. . . . it is time to begin up-dating some of our paperwork. Uugh! However, I don't foresee this being quite as tedious as it was the first time through, thankfully.

So what does need up-dated and completed?

• Our fingerprints for USCIS (US citizenship and immigration services) need to be up-dated. They expire on 12/24/09, but you have to start the process early. We will actually be getting a free fingerprint renewal this time around.
• We are also applying for a grant from Lifesong for Orphans to help with some of our travel costs (approx. $15,000). This requires each of us (Eric and I) to fill out a lengthy application form. It takes quite an extensive look into family finances and our personal walks of Christian faith. We are hoping for success this time around. When we applied for Shohannah's Hope we made it to the final four possible recipients (They pick one family per month.)- but weren't chosen. So that made us slow to apply elsewhere.

This is all that I am aware of at the moment. But I have a feeling that there will be more to come as we wait. It seems that referrals have slowed down for the time being, and Eric and I are stuck at the "half-way" mark "in line"(according to the Bethany forum web page). We were hopeful for a referral, face, gender, etc. by Christmas time, but right now it looks like it could be some time after that till we would know anything. Patience. . . . patience. . . patience.

Boston or Bust

Eric and I decided that our BIG summer vacation this year, our last one as DINKS (duel income, no kids), would be to Historic Boston. Niether of us had been to the New England area north of New York. We traveled up to our hotel on Wednesday and enjoyed a delicious Thai meal for our supper. Then Thursday we spent in down town Boston. It started out as a sunny day, but as the day progresssed it became overcast, cold and drizzly.

Our first adventure (besides the subway and train system) was a Whale Watch tour with the Boston New England Aquarium. As you can see, the city sky line was masked with hovering clouds. (And the salt water and humidity made my hair a bit frizzy.) Thanks to Dramamine neither of us experienced what deep sea fisherman experience, even though there were 2-4 foot swells.

We did see two humpback whales, a mother and her calf. The baby did most of the acrobatics for us to ooh and ahhh over. It was worth the hour and a half boat ride out to the feeding grounds of Stellwagen Bank to watch and see!

Friday was a rain day. We spent most of our day inside the hotel watching movies, swimming in the in-door pool, and napping.

Saturday was beautiful!! We drove to Plymoth (the town) and visited the Plimoth Plantation, museum, and Indian village. The plantation overlooked the bay. I wish Boston, MA were closer to home. I'd love to take my second graders for a field trip. It was very interesting to listen to the actors and actresses dressed up as reinactors of the day and time of the plantation, 1627.

Inside the Wampanoag Indian long house.

We also went to Plymoth bay to see the Mayflower II. It is a replica of the original Mayflower built in 1951. I couldn't believe that 102 passengers fit in that tiny boat. And. . . that it made it across the ocean from Europe!!

The final day was spent traveling back home (7 and a half hours with stops). It was a great, relaxing time away. But it always nice to come home again. . .

Rest and Relaxation

Camping is a favorite family past time on both sides of our family. This past weekend we traveled with Eric's family to Carlisle's Western Village RV Park for some R & R. It was a great time to bond as a family over meals, campfire, and conversation. There was plenty around to do, but all we prefered to do was the afore mentioned. Other activities were talked about, but not pressing enough to actually get up and go do them. Well, we did play frisbee and baseball with Bryce and Marah, and take a few strolls through the park. But other than that we spent most of our time snoozing, sitting and relaxing. Somehow getting away from the stress (and location of it) allows for more relaxed and deeper sleeping. Imagine that!
An example of Resting and Relaxing: Breakfast finished and dishes washed, cleared and packed away. Ahhh. . . sitting feels good.

Marah and Bryce found joy in playing in the discarded dishwater. What simple pleasures!

Uncle Eric playing "Cars" with Bryce and Marah. . . this is also their favorite movie at the moment.

Black Baby White Hands meets Facing the Giants

I have completed my first summer reading, which was a very eye opening and intriguing book. The author, Jaiya John, is an African American adoptee who was adopted into a white family in 1968, the same year Martin Luther King, Jr. was assassinated. The book is his autobiography of a Black child growing up in a White family, neighborhood, country, and culture. He gives great insight into his personal struggles in forming his identity as a transracial adoptee.

And now my simplistic view of inter-racial adoption has forever been changed. At times the book left me feeling in over my head, too ambitious and juvenile in our decision, unprepared and inexperienced, and sometimes completely unfit. Now that my eyes are (more) wide open to the complexity of inter-racial adoption I find myself fearful and questioning my parenting abilities.

Love can cover a multitude of imperfections, but I now know that it will not cover everything, specifically my perceived laziness/indifference to my child’s ethnicity. I will have to step up and make conscious decisions and choices to become first a student and then a teacher of my child’s culture and heritage. It will need to become authentically part of my own culture. This is exciting and at the same times a bit daunting.

Eric and I enjoy learning about and experiencing other cultures. However, I look around and honestly reflect on: our community, our church, our group of friends, and our family, our day to day interactions and routines, and I see very little authentic interaction with African Americans, Ethiopian Americans, or people from other ethnicities or cultural groups. We subconsciously stick to what is comfortable: socio-economically, religiously (Anabaptist), culturally similar to our own. As a more introverted couple, thinking of forcing ourselves into the uncomfortable is frightening and feels like a lot of work.

HOWEVER: God reminded me last night of some very important truths that trump ALL of these “heavy” feelings. Eric and I went to see (for the first time) Facing the Giants at our church’s movie night. I was not expecting to find inspiration and motivation for adoption issues in a “sports” movie. Needless to say God used it and I was shocked to tears on several occasions. For example, one of these occasions was after the Eagles had won the state championship and Grant was moving from teammate to teammate and asking them individually “Is there anything God can’t do? Is there anything impossible for God?” It was like the question was asked directly to me, “April, is there anything I can’t do? Is inter-racial adoption and parenting bigger than Me?”

“No, God! Of course not! But it feels so much bigger than me.”

“And that is where I will receive all the glory.”

“Oh. . . . . . . . Oh!!”

God, may You be glorified in our triumphs and our failures as parents. May You shine through our weaknesses in spite of our fears. Help us to be the David’s that with Your help stand to face our Giants. Amen.